recovery-unbroken

From Sobriety to Recovery: How I Took My Power Back Through the Pause

Tue, 31 Mar 2026 12:04:27 GMT

"I didn’t get sober because I had it figured out. I got sober because I finally realized I didn’t."

My sober date is 9-22-22. Before that, I drank for thirty years.

Toward the end, I was at a point where I wanted to stop—but couldn’t. That’s a hard place to explain unless you’ve been there. The desire is real, but so is the grip. You start to see what needs to change, but you don’t yet have the ability to change it. Around that time, I found Daniel Patterson on TikTok. There’s a large recovery community there, and something about the way he spoke cut through the noise for me. I wasn’t sober yet—but I was listening. Watching. Thinking. In a way, that was the beginning. He helped me believe it was possible to get where I eventually got.

When I finally stopped drinking, sobriety was simple in theory, but not easy in practice. It was about getting through the day. Holding the line. But even early on, I noticed something that had been true for a long time: I didn’t know how to pause. When I was drinking, I reacted quickly—to stress, to conflict, to emotion. I gave away my power in those moments because I wasn’t choosing my responses—I was reacting. That awareness was already there. Sobriety just made it impossible to ignore.

Early in my sobriety, I reconnected with that same community and officially joined on my 100th day— January 1st, 2023.

That was my first real experience with connection in sobriety. Being around people who understood what I was going through helped me slow down. It reinforced something I had already started to see: If I could learn to pause, I could start to take my power back.

Six months into sobriety, I started therapy. That’s when things began to shift from sobriety into recovery. Therapy gave me tools. It gave me language. It helped me understand not just that I was reacting, but why. Around that same time, I started leaning into stoicism—focusing on maintaining an emotional baseline instead of riding constant highs and lows. That’s where “the pause” became something intentional. The pause shows up in my life in simple ways: - Stopping to think before reacting- Physically stepping away from a situation- Not responding to a text for hours—or even days.

And sometimes, it shows up at a gas pump.

After you insert your card, there’s always a delay before the pump is ready. The instinct is to squeeze the handle right away—and you get that dreaded clunk. Nothing happens. I use that moment as a reminder. Pause. Wait. Be ready. It’s a small thing, but that’s the point. I practice the pause in everyday moments so it’s there when it actually matters. Because those small moments are where it’s built. You don’t suddenly gain control in high-pressure situations. You fall back on what you’ve trained. And for me, training the pause became part of daily life.

In that space between stimulus and response, I found something I didn’t have before: Choice.

The original community I joined eventually dissolved, but a few of us stayed connected. Out of that, we created something new: Recovery Unbroken .

That group became more than support—it became a lifeline.

A place where honesty mattered.

Where showing up mattered.

Where you didn’t have to pretend you had it all together.

And at one point, I really didn’t. 2 In the summer of 2024, I found myself in a battle with major depression, high anxiety, and eventually suicidal thoughts.

It didn’t happen overnight. It built slowly, then all at once. That period tested everything. But it also showed me what I had built—and who I had around me.

My wife showed up for me.

My kids showed up for me.

My friends in Recovery Unbroken showed up for me.

My therapist showed up for me.

And with their support, I made the decision to enter a Partial Hospitalization Program (PHP). That decision likely saved my life.

Today, recovery means something very different to me than it did in the beginning. It’s not just about staying sober. It’s about awareness. It’s about discipline. It’s about connection. It’s about not isolating when things get hard. It’s about keeping my power.

And for me, that all comes back to the pause. That moment between what happens to you and how you respond—that’s where everything changes.

I still practice it every day.

Not because I have to. But because I know what happens when I don’t.

Sobriety got me started. Recovery is what’s keeping me here. And none of it was built alone.

If you’re in that place where you want to stop but feel like you can’t—I was there too.

Welcome Home: What Sweet Dreams Reminded Me About Recovery

Tue, 27 Jan 2026 20:30:23 GMT

Recovery is not just about stopping substances. It is about restoring belonging.

Welcome Home: What Sweet Dreams Reminded Me About Recovery

By Aaron D. Perry

I recently watched the movie Sweet Dreams , and it hit me harder than I expected. Not because it was dramatic or perfectly written, but because it felt accurate. It felt like residential treatment. It felt like sober living. It felt like that strange, sacred space where people aren’t at their worst anymore, but they’re still close enough to it that everything feels raw, honest, and real.

There is a particular kind of bond that forms in those environments. Not when people are still spiraling, but when they have just started to come back up. When they are exhausted, scared, detoxed enough to feel things again, and quietly wondering if they are capable of becoming someone new. In those spaces, recovery is not an individual project. It is communal. You eat together. You sit in circles together. You share rooms, stories, jokes, breakdowns, and moments of hope. Leadership exists, yes, but so does something just as powerful. Ordinary people simply showing up for the next person.

I have been to treatment eleven times. IOP, inpatient, residential . One of the earliest signs that I might someday work in this field showed up at Rogers Behavioral Health in Oconomowoc, Wisconsin. We had some incredible techs there. Real human beings who knew how to talk to people when they were vulnerable. During scheduled downtime, we sometimes wanted to go to the gym or the game room, but we needed staff to accompany us. It always took some convincing. And somehow, I became the guy everyone nominated to go make the case.

Even back then, something in me wanted to advocate. To negotiate. To build little bridges between structure and humanity. At the time, I just thought I was being helpful. Now, looking back, it feels like a forecast of everything that came later.

I arrived at Rogers in rough shape. Throwing up in the intake office in the middle of the night. Barely conscious for days. On day four, a girl named Katie came into the unit. She looked like life had beaten her up a little. Cute, but worn. She was thinking about leaving. I told her, just do not go home. Give it a few days. We became friends in rehab.

Later, she dragged me to art therapy. She sat on my right. Another girl named Victoria sat on my left. When it was Victoria’s turn to share, she calmly said she struggled with suicidal and homicidal thoughts… while holding sharpened colored pencils in her hands. I remember looking at Katie and saying, yeah, thanks. We laughed. Nervously. But we stayed.

That moment was not therapeutic because of the art. It was therapeutic because of the people. Three strangers sitting in a room, none of us okay, but all of us there.

Years later, I found myself at the Milwaukee House of Corrections during COVID. Sixty eight beds in one massive room. Thirty four bunk beds. Everyone sleeping in the same space. If twelve people snored, everyone heard it. Every night. No privacy. No escape. Just time.

That is where I first started organizing informal recovery meetings. All we had was a blue book and each other. I used to ask the guys, how many people here do you think are here because of guns, girls, drugs, or alcohol? And of course, it was almost everyone. The ones who were tired of the drugs and alcohol part would gather, and we would talk. No credentials. No program. Just a small community in one of the hardest environments imaginable.

I was only allowed to speak to my kids once while I was in jail. It was planned. Timed. Controlled. I remember hearing their voices on the other end. Not so much pain, more confusion. Where is dad? Why is he there? I did not fully understand the weight of that moment until later, when I saw what that confusion eventually turned into.

Getting my kids back through family court, staying sober through that entire process, and being present in their lives again is the greatest accomplishment of my life.

After all of that, I had the privilege of helping build a sober house from absolutely nothing. No furniture. No light bulbs. No garbage cans. Nothing. We created a recovery environment from scratch and then started welcoming people into it. Some of those people had been homeless the night before. One guy slept behind a Jimmy John’s so he would not miss his intake appointment. He was our first resident. When he walked in, I said, welcome home.

That line still means everything to me.

He eventually relapsed. Most do. But for a period of time, he had safety, structure, dignity, and people who cared whether he lived or died. And sometimes, that interruption… that pause in the spiral… is life saving in ways we will never fully be able to measure.

That is what Sweet Dreams captures so well. Not the fantasy of recovery, but the humanity of it. The awkward humor. The group meals. The roommates. The shared activities. The leadership roles mixed with ordinary people just trying to help the next person. It is not about perfect success stories. It is about people rebuilding identity in real time, together.

Most people in Recovery Unbroken have never lived in those environments, and that is actually a gift. It means they chose recovery before crisis forced it on them. They did not need a locked door or a treatment bed to stay. They chose community while still having their home, their family, their job, their freedom.

RU is essentially a sober house for people who never needed one.

And that is remarkable.

What connects Sweet Dreams, my treatment experiences, my jail recovery groups, my sober house work, and RU is the same underlying truth. Recovery is not just about stopping substances. It is about restoring belonging. It is about identity. It is about learning how to be human with other humans again.

In treatment and sober living, community is survival based. It forms quickly and intensely because people are fighting for their lives. In RU, community is growth based. It is voluntary. It is preventative. It is people choosing to protect what they have already built instead of waiting until it collapses.

Both are real recovery. They just operate at different points on the same spectrum.

And that is why I feel such deep gratitude for RU. Not because it saved my life… but because it helps me live it better.

The thing that actually heals us is not willpower. Not discipline. Not even sobriety itself.

It is relationship.

We do not heal in isolation.

We heal in community.

And every time we say welcome home, to someone else or to ourselves, we are choosing to stay human together.

There is Beauty in Starting Over

Wed, 14 Jan 2026 00:36:19 GMT

"Starting over is where honesty lives. It’s where excuses finally get tired."

There Is Beauty in Starting Over

Most people think starting over means you failed…

That you broke something…

That you lost…

That you ran out of options.

I see it differently.

Starting over isn’t an admission of defeat…period…period…period

It’s an act of clarity.

It’s the moment you stop negotiating with what’s hurting you and start telling the truth about what you want. And there is real, quiet, undeniable beauty in that moment.

I’ve started over more times than I can count. Careers. Identity. Health. Relationships. Recovery. Sobriety. Life itself. I used to think that meant I was behind. Now I know it means I was paying attention.

Because starting over requires courage. Not the loud kind. The internal kind. The kind where you wake up one day and say, I can’t keep doing this to myself…and then you actually do something about it.

There’s beauty in that.

Starting over is where honesty lives. It’s where excuses finally get tired. It’s where you stop asking, “Can I manage this?” and start asking, “What would it look like to actually feel okay?” Not perfect. Not fixed. Just okay. Stable. Present. Alive.

For a lot of people, especially when it comes to alcohol, starting over feels terrifying. Alcohol has a way of convincing you that it’s both the problem and the solution. That without it, life will be smaller. Quieter. Duller. Less fun. Less you.

That’s a lie I believed for a long time.

The truth…sobriety didn’t shrink my world. It gave it edges again. Color. Range. Depth. It gave me mornings I could trust and nights I didn’t have to apologize for. It gave me consistency. Self-respect. And eventually…joy.

Real joy. Not borrowed joy. Not chemically financed happiness that comes with interest and penalties.

Here’s something people don’t talk about enough. Quitting drinking isn’t just an emotional decision or a mental health decision. It’s a financial one. A physical one. A long-term quality-of-life decision.

The cost of alcohol is staggering when you actually look at it. Daily drinks. Weekends. Missed work. Health consequences. Relationships strained or lost. The chaos tax. The constant rebuilding.

When I actually ran the numbers for myself, the comparison was almost laughable.

Two one-on-one coaching sessions per month…

A full month of community support…

All of that combined came out to about 17% of what it cost me to drink every day.

Which means this…

By quitting drinking and adding coaching and community, I was saving 83% of what I was already spending.

Not someday. Not hypothetically. Right away.

And that number could be even better for a lot of people. That was just my real, conservative math.

So this idea that recovery or sobriety is expensive doesn’t hold up. What’s expensive is staying stuck. What’s expensive is continuing to pay for something that keeps taking more and giving less.

Starting over doesn’t mean you have to do it alone. In fact, trying to do it alone is usually why people get stuck. We aren’t wired for isolation. We’re wired for connection. Reflection. Accountability. And yes…a little humor along the way.

That’s why I do what I do.

I’m not speaking from theory. I’m speaking from lived experience. I’ve been to rehab more times than I care to admit. I’ve sat on both sides of the table. I’ve been the person who couldn’t imagine life without alcohol…and the person who now can’t imagine going back.

I’m a Certified Peer Recovery Specialist (CPRS)…but more importantly, I’m someone who understands what it feels like when your internal world doesn’t match how “fine” you look on the outside. I understand bipolar swings. I understand shame. I understand the fear of letting go of the one thing that feels like it’s holding everything together…even when it’s clearly not.

Recovery Unbroken was built on that understanding.

Our sobriety and recovery community isn’t about perfection. It’s not about rules or labels or pretending everything is okay. It’s a safe space to be genuine. Vulnerable. Authentic. And yes…fun. We laugh. We talk about real life. We focus forward. We build lives that actually feel worth protecting.

This is the exciting side of recovery. The part people don’t show you. The side where clarity replaces chaos. Where energy comes back online. Where you stop bracing for impact and start making plans.

Starting over doesn’t erase your past. It redeems it. It turns experience into wisdom and pain into purpose. It gives your story weight instead of regret.

And maybe the most important part. Starting over isn’t a lifetime sentence. It’s a starting line. One decision. One action. One honest yes.

Yes to sobriety coaching.

Yes to recovery support.

Yes to community.

Yes to choosing yourself.

If the world feels unescapable right now, hear this clearly. There is an exit. It doesn’t require you to become someone else. It requires you to come home to who you already are…without the noise.

There is beauty in starting over.

And if you’re ready…put the bottle down. Pick up the phone . Send the email.

I’ll walk with you while you do it.

~Aaron Perry, Co-Founder <---Click to call and get started.

How did I get here?

Tue, 21 Oct 2025 20:58:29 GMT

"There's peace in the same places that used to hold chaos"

It’s not a memoir. It’s not a speech. It’s just me taking a deep breath and finally saying it out

loud ~ how did I get here? I say it a lot lately. Not in confusion. Not even in disbelief. But in

a kind of quiet amazement. Gratitude mixed with awe. Because I look around and realize my

life doesn’t just look different ~ it feels different. The air is lighter. The colors are brighter.

There’s peace in the same places that used to hold chaos.

Three years ago, I couldn’t have pictured this. I didn’t know this kind of life was possible ~

not for me. I wasn’t even aware I was capable of it. I didn’t think I’d get here ~ not to peace,

not to joy, not to love that feels like home. But here I am.

The pace of how this all happened still catches me off guard sometimes. Everything came at

me fast, but not in the way chaos used to. This time it was goodness that came rushing in. I

said yes to recovery, yes to rebuilding, yes to believing again ~ and somehow all the right

doors started opening. My kids, who I once thought I might never see grow up the way I

hoped they would, are all here, and they’re thriving. Jackson has a home that exists because

people refused to take no for an answer. Donna and I and Carver County literally changed a

state moratorium so that a house could exist for him ~ the Sunfish House. That’s a miracle

dressed up as a policy decision.

And Donna. What do you even say about someone who turns the lights on inside you? She

added color to what used to be black and white. My life was going to be simple, small, safe.

Then she showed up, and somehow the whole world filled in. I don’t mean that

romantically, although that’s part of it. I mean that I learned what it feels like to wake up

excited again. She’s brought happiness into my life and my kids’ lives that I can’t even

measure yet. She’s in long-term recovery too, and we share that language ~ of gratitude,

growth, and grace. Two people who said yes to healing and found each other on the other

side of it.

When I say my life feels like a Hallmark movie, I mean that ~ and it’s real. It’s fun, it’s

hopeful, it’s full. I laugh every day. I work hard. I get to do meaningful things that make a

difference.

I get to lead Recovery Unbroken, a sober peer-to-peer community that Donna and I now

run. It’s built on hope and lived experience, created to help people not just get sober, but

learn how to be sober ~ from the ground up. It’s about helping them stay that way and

actually build lives they want to live.

And I get to serve. That’s been huge for me. I’ve spoken in treatment centers and churches

and programs in New Jersey, St. Louis, Nashville, Scottsdale, and right here in Minnesota.

I’ve stood in Kensington in Philadelphia, one of the hardest-hit neighborhoods in the

country, handing out clothes and food and reminders that people still care. Both times I

went, I paid for the food myself. Not because I wanted credit, but because I promised God,

back in a cell, that if I got out alive, I’d spend my life giving back. And I meant it.

That’s the deal I made, and it’s one I’m proud to keep.

So yeah, sometimes I stop and look around and just think ~ how did I get here? How did

this happen so fast? I didn’t chase it. I didn’t force it. I stayed ready. I stayed sober. I kept

showing up. And life, somehow, started saying yes back.

I’m not afraid of anything anymore. Not heights, not pain, not failure, not snakes, not

needles, not death. I’ve faced worse and lived to talk about it. But I’ll admit ~ I do worry.

I’m not afraid to die, but I worry what it would do to the people who love me. To my kids. To

Donna. To my parents. That’s what gets me sometimes, that thought. Like maybe all these

blessings are being poured in so fast because my time here’s shorter than I realize. I don’t

know. None of us do. But if that’s the case, then I’ll spend whatever time I’ve got saying yes

~ again and again ~ to the life waiting on the other side of fear.

That’s what recovery gave me: permission to live unafraid. Permission to say yes to joy.

Permission to believe in possibility. The people in Recovery Unbroken didn’t think this kind

of life was possible either, but now they’re living it too. That’s the part that keeps me

humble and keeps me going ~ knowing that this isn’t just my story anymore. It’s ours.

I don’t know why I was chosen to still be here. But I am. And that’s enough. I’m not chasing

answers anymore. I’m living them.

So how did I get here?

By saying yes ~ again and again ~ to the life waiting on the other side of fear.

Vacation, all I ever wanted...

Fri, 16 May 2025 12:08:38 GMT

"Vacations don’t need alcohol to be fulfilling. I lived that lie for too long"

Vacation, All I Ever Wanted…

Yes, that’s an 80's tune by The Go-Go’s. I’m definitely dating myself, but I thought it was a fun way to start this post.

I recently returned from Recovery Unbroken’s second retreat in the beautiful desert landscapes of Scottsdale and Sedona, Arizona. To say it was an enjoyable and fun getaway would be an understatement. It was all that—and it was healing. This marked my fifth vacation completely sober (I’m nearly two and a half years sober at the time of this post), and sharing it with 10 fellow RU members made it even more meaningful. We usually meet three times a week on Zoom, but in person just hits differently.

We connected poolside under sunny skies and warm desert temps, catching up and talking about the weekend’s events, which included a day trip to Sedona, a sound bath, and a powerful sweat lodge experience.

Vacations of The Past:

In the past, vacations started the night before departure—cracking beers while packing, my excitement rising with every drink. Hungover on a travel day? No big deal. I was going on vacation, right?

A beer or two at the airport to “level out,” a few more on the plane—after all, vacation mode had kicked in. Then, arrival. Game on. Stock the fridge with beers for the night anyway, throw on sandals and a swimsuit, and head straight for the pool or beach bar. Then dinner and drinks. Then a club or bar to round out the night. The next day? Hungover. Sleeping in. Foggy. Dragging through some touristy activity while sipping beers that didn’t really help—just numbed the edges.

The next few vacation days, in search of that buzz? Elusive. A few hours of “fun” followed by a crashing wave of exhaustion and regret. After a few days, I’d start to wonder: Am I even enjoying this?

Sure, parts of it were fun. The escape, the letting go. But most of the time, my body and mind were in survival mode—trying desperately to recover. Returning home was the worst. I’d feel wrecked, repulsed by alcohol, and overwhelmed by the return to routine. I’d lie and say it was a “great vacation.” But the hangover anxiety lingered for days.

Five Sober Vacations:

Now, five vacations into sobriety, the experience is completely different. Here's a quick recap:

Mammoth Lakes, California – My first sober trip. A regular vacation spot for me. I felt cheated without the usual drinking routine. The activities were great—skiing, hiking, lake time—but evenings were triggering. It was tough.
Michigan – Visiting relatives at a lake house. A classic summer drinking environment. This trip was a bit easier. I focused on the family, the lake, and relied heavily on my sobriety toolbox: NA beers, sparkling water, favorite snacks.
Friend’s Ranch, Central California – A challenging trip. Booze was everywhere. But again, the toolbox helped. I stayed grounded and had a great time.
Recovery Unbroken Retreat, Nashville, Tennessee – An unforgettable trip with fellow RU members. We embraced the music, dined well, and enjoyed the city—sober. The camaraderie and support proved that you can have fun in a party town without drinking.
Scottsdale & Sedona, Arizona – The most recent RU retreat. The desert is such a healing place. I actually lived in Tempe for five years while attending ASU (a whole other blog post could be written about my college drinking days). The air, the landscape, the sky—everything felt restorative. The sound bath, the sweat lodge, and especially the car rides with fellow RU members—those moments of shared reflection and connection were deeply meaningful.

A New Way to Travel

Coming home from these sober trips feels different. I remember everything. There’s little recovery needed—aside from normal travel fatigue—and transitioning back to everyday life is smoother.

Vacations don’t need alcohol to be fulfilling. I lived that lie for too long. Now, with a new perspective, I can truly say that sober vacations are not only possible, but better.

If you’re early in your sobriety journey, I encourage you to take a sober trip. Even if it’s just one town over and one night in a hotel. Notice how you feel during and after. It gets easier. Eventually, it becomes the new, welcomed norm.

--Charles W.

The Tree That Grew From Concrete: My Journey With A Tree Born Crooked

Fri, 16 May 2025 12:08:36 GMT

"Something in me wanted to believe there was still a story worth reading-mine and the one in my hands."

The Tree That Grew From Concrete: My Journey With A Tree Born Crooked

By Aaron Perry

Some books you read.

Others...you survive with.

On January 10th, 2022, I was arrested mid-group at an alcohol treatment facility for violating probation-by

drinking and going to rehab. Instead of finishing treatment, I was taken to the Oneida County Jail in Rhinelander, Wisconsin. What followed were six months in four different jails, including solitary confinement, communal cells, and a stretch at Milwaukee County Jail-a place that redefines your understanding of noise, violence, and hopelessness.

I was going through post-alcohol withdrawal syndrome.

I hadn't seen darkness in days. I hadn't heard silence in reality or in my head in years.

And I hadn't felt peace in what felt like a lifetime.

What kept me alive-and I don't say that lightly-were books. Thirteen of them. One, in particular, A Tree Born

Crooked by Steph Post, didn't just pass the time. It took me out of time. Out of jail. Out of pain.

I picked it up for one simple reason: the title. At that time, I felt exactly that-crooked. Not just from addiction,

but from the bipolar disorder I was still learning to live with. I felt like I was somehow born wrong, like I was

never going to grow straight or clean or proud. But something in me grabbed that book anyway. Something in

me wanted to believe there was still a story worth reading-mine and the one in my hands. That decision

changed everything.

Reading it under the covers of my cell, I traveled. Not just in my imagination, but in spirit. Her writing is that

vivid. That transporting. Though the book is set in Florida, I saw Missouri-my Missouri-because that's what

my mind needed. Missouri is my home state. I was born in Hannibal, lived in St. Louis, and spent time in

Cape Girardeau. My family has had roots in the Ozarks for decades. Though the setting was fictional, the soul

of the story took me home.

I got about three-quarters through the book before I was moved. After solitary, after 10-man cells, I was

transported to Milwaukee County Jail. It was hell, flatly. I saw things I can never unsee. I felt the worth of

human life shrink in real time. I didn't even get to finish the book.

Until one Monday-weeks later-a volunteer librarian came through. I asked her, hopelessly, if she had A Tree

Born Crooked. She didn't. But two Mondays later, she came back. Winked. And placed a brand-new copy in

my hands. She said, "I found it on sale." That tiny act of kindness, it was everything. I finished the book. And

in finishing it, I reclaimed something that had been stolen from me: peace.

When I reached one year sober, I kept a promise I had made to myself in that cell: I got a tattoo. A crooked

tree, shaped just like the story that helped keep me alive. Woven into its branches is an "O," a subtle nod to the

Ozarks and to Ozark, the show I watched before all this broke loose.

The tattoo sits above my heart. The book lives inside it.

Each quadrant inside that "O" holds meaning: the triangle for recovery, the shield for protection, the clasped

hands to represent parenting my son Jackson, who has autism-and one space still left blank. I'm still growing

into it.

Through the twists and turns of recovery-and the miracle that is Recovery Unbroken-something even more

beautiful happened. My business partner, my girlfriend, my soulmate Donna reached out to Steph Post. She

told her my story. And Steph responded. With grace. With heart. With full presence.

On Tuesday, May 20th, Steph Post will lead a Recovery Unbroken book club on A Tree Born Crooked. She

even sent me a signed copy, complete with a heartfelt message I'll keep forever. But what she did next, that's

what floored me.

For our latest RU retreat in Phoenix, I wanted to share her newest book, Terra Incognita, with every member

of our group. I ordered copies for each person-but Steph took it further. She personally signed each one. Every

name. Every sober date. Every human seen, honored, and celebrated.

And on the first day of that retreat, I had the privilege of handing out those books. From a jail cell floor to a

retreat in the desert-that's recovery. That's what happens when story becomes lifeline. When an author doesn't

just write about redemption, but becomes part of yours.

To go from reading A Tree Born Crooked in my darkest place to giving out personalized copies of Steph's

work to the members of Recovery Unbroken-the very community Donna and I founded-is a testament. A

testament to healing. A testament to connection. And a testament to permanence.

The permanence of the crooked tree above my heart.

The permanence of the peace that book gave me.

And the permanence of the recovery we now help others walk into.

Steph Post's writing isn't just good-it's art. It's air. It's imagery you feel with all five senses, even when those

senses are overloaded by trauma.

To her, I say thank you.

To the universe that brought her words to me when I needed them most, I say thank you.

And to everyone in Recovery Unbroken who's ever found refuge in story, may this one hold you like it held

me.

Recovery Unbroken: Sedona, Scottsdale, and the Sacred Work of Showing Up

info@recoveryunbroken.com (Recovery Unbroken) — Fri, 09 May 2025 11:21:20 GMT

Recovery unbroken plants their flag in arizona!

There’s something uniquely powerful about Recovery Unbroken. We aren’t built around one method or one ideology. We don’t follow the 12 Steps—but we don’t reject them either. We’re not here to tell anyone that our way is the only way. What we offer is a community of people in recovery who deeply support one another through honesty, connection, consistency, and care. And what we’ve built over time, especially through our in-person retreats, is something rare and beautiful—a reminder that healing doesn’t just happen in a treatment center or in a workbook. Sometimes, it happens in the quiet desert air, in a sweat lodge, in a moment of shared laughter, or in a signed novel gifted with love.

This past weekend, May 2–4, 2025, we held our second official Recovery Unbroken retreat in Scottsdale and Sedona, Arizona. It followed our inaugural retreat in Nashville last fall, where we explored a vibrant city together—fully sober. Nashville was energetic and fun, filled with music, dancing, recovery meetings, and service opportunities. But Arizona gave us something different. It was calmer. Quieter. Softer on the senses. And that difference was intentional. At Recovery Unbroken, we talk often about the five senses—how overstimulation impacts our nervous system and how we can use sensory awareness to regulate emotions and stay grounded. Arizona gave us space to do just that.

We began the retreat with a service opportunity on Friday morning. A small group of us visited a local Partial Hospitalization Program (PHP) and spoke to a group of clients currently in treatment for substance use and mental health challenges. For an hour, we shared our stories, answered questions, and reminded them that there is life—and joy—after treatment. This was more than a presentation. It was a promise. We don’t just talk about recovery—we live it. And part of that living means staying connected to the recovery community, especially through peer support. As co-founder and Certified Peer Recovery Specialist (CPRS), I’ve spoken to groups across the country about the power of connection after treatment ends. And that’s exactly what Recovery Unbroken provides: a consistent, caring space where people don’t just survive sobriety—they thrive in it.

After the service event, more members arrived in Scottsdale, and we welcomed them with gift bags that included t-shirts and something incredibly meaningful: signed books by author Steph Post. Steph’s novel A Tree Born Crooked is one I read while incarcerated—a time when my surroundings were loud, violent, and traumatizing. That book offered me a mental escape. I could see the scenes so vividly that, for a few minutes at a time, I wasn’t in jail. I was in her story. On my one-year sobriety anniversary, I even got a tattoo inspired by that book. My partner, Donna Bonk—Recovery Unbroken’s co-founder—knew how much that story meant to me. She reached out to Steph, who not only signed a personal copy for me but also sent a signed book to each retreat attendee, inscribed with their sober date. That gesture turned a powerful memory into a shared moment of reflection and honor.

Friday evening included our regular RU meeting, just as we always do. We’ve never once canceled a meeting, and this weekend was no exception. The setting may change, but our commitment never does.

Saturday morning, we rose early and made our way to Sedona. Known for its stunning landscapes and powerful energy vortexes, Sedona is a place of spiritual significance for many. For us, it became sacred ground for two profoundly healing experiences. First, we participated in a private sound bowl ceremony. In a serene space, surrounded by stillness and resonance, we let the tones of the bowls wash over us. Many of us—myself included—were moved to tears. I had intended to say a prayer of gratitude for my children, but emotion hit me before I could speak. And in that moment of vulnerability, I wasn’t alone. That’s a core value in Recovery Unbroken: we don’t cry alone. What followed was a flood of connection, understanding, and gentle support. No advice. No fixing. Just presence.

Later that evening, six of us participated in a ceremonial sweat as the sun began to set. The experience was both physically and emotionally cleansing. Inside the sweat lodge, we spoke prayers of gratitude and forgiveness. We addressed our ancestors, our past selves, and those who are no longer with us. We acknowledged harm caused, harm received, and the things we still carry. The heat, though manageable, became a symbolic force—an outer reflection of the inner work we were doing. We were allowed to drink water, to rest if needed, and to emerge lighter. It wasn’t about perfection or performance. It was about release.

This retreat also highlighted another important aspect of what makes Recovery Unbroken different: we meet people where they’re at. That’s not just a saying—it’s a trained approach, especially for Certified Peer Recovery Specialists. We don't give medical advice or tell people what medications they should or shouldn’t take. But we do talk openly about our own experiences with mental health, medication, trauma, and healing. We use tools like CBT and DBT to guide our conversations, not as clinicians, but as peers who’ve been there. Our weekly meetings, our active group chats, and now our retreats give people space to share what works for them—and to hear what might work for others.

On Sunday, we held our final retreat meeting before members began to travel back home. But the energy we cultivated doesn’t disappear once the bags are packed. It carries into our weekly Zoom meetings. It flows through our texts and voice notes. It shows up in our choices—what we say yes to, what we say no to, and how we continue choosing recovery every single day.

Perhaps most exciting of all, members are already planning for the next retreat. We're looking at different regions of the country to make it accessible for more people. What’s become clear is that these weekends are no longer 'extras.' They’re becoming priorities. And when we prioritize recovery, we protect it. When we invest in connection, we strengthen it.

Recovery Unbroken isn’t a program. It’s a living, breathing community. We’re not trying to replace anything—we’re building something new. Something honest. Something unshakable. And after Sedona and Scottsdale, we are more grounded, more grateful, and more ready than ever to keep walking this path—together.

Recovery for the Holidays

Thu, 12 Dec 2024 22:34:54 GMT

"By preparing your response and exit strategy, you stay in control instead of letting old patterns dictate your actions."

Navigating Family Gatherings in Early Recovery: A Practical Guide

Returning to familiar places, especially during the early days of recovery, can be emotionally complex. It’s natural to feel some anxiety as you head back to a setting filled with memories—good and bad. The key is preparation, mindfulness, and having a plan. Here’s how to navigate these challenges while staying grounded and focused on your recovery.

1. Anticipate Anxiety and Practice Visualization

It’s normal to feel uneasy returning to places tied to old habits. Preparing yourself mentally can make discomfort more manageable.

Start by visualizing the experience in advance. Picture your surroundings: the smells of home, the comfort of your favorite baked goods, the warmth of a family hug. Imagine these positive moments vividly. Even taking just five minutes before your arrival to picture this scene can have a calming effect.

Practicing this visualization repeatedly in the days leading up to your trip will give you a sense of control , helping you adapt to new or emotionally charged surroundings with confidence.

2. Prioritize Rest to Avoid Triggers

Arriving at a family gathering sleep-deprived is a recipe for disaster. When you’re exhausted, it’s much harder to handle emotions or resist temptations. Poor sleep also makes you more vulnerable to triggers like hunger or irritability, which can lead to relapse.

Remember HALT: Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired—four states that increase the risk of cravings. Proper sleep and maintaining a routine can help you avoid half of this dangerous equation before you even step through the door.

3. Break Old Habits Before They Break You

Family gatherings often involve traditions, and for many, those traditions include alcohol. Whether it’s sipping wine by the kitchen island or sharing beers on the patio, these moments can catch you off guard if you’re unprepared.

Have a response ready when someone offers you a drink. Practice saying it until it feels natural:

“No thanks, I’m sticking to water tonight.”

“I’ve cut back—thank you for understanding.”

When the volume rises, and the crowd starts to feel overwhelming, know your next step. Walk away, grab some fresh air, or text a supportive friend . By preparing your response and exit strategy, you stay in control instead of letting old patterns dictate your actions.

4. Share Your Journey with a Trusted Ally

One of the most important steps in navigating a family visit is ensuring someone in the room knows about your sobriety. If you’re avoiding telling even one person, ask yourself why. Family can be emotional, triggering, and complicated—but having a trusted ally present can be the difference between feeling supported and feeling isolated.

If no one in your family is ready to fill that role, consider whether the trip is worth it right now. Early sobriety isn’t the time to push your limits without a support system.

5. Avoid Dramatic Gestures or Conversations

Family gatherings can tempt us to prove how much we’ve changed or to resolve old conflicts. But remember, sobriety is a process, and so is rebuilding trust.

Resist the urge to make dramatic proclamations during high-pressure moments like holiday dinners. Instead, focus on enjoying the gathering and showing your growth through your actions. Deep, meaningful conversations about your recovery or seeking forgiveness are better saved for calmer, more intimate moments. A laid-back Sunday afternoon may be the perfect time for these discussions, rather than the chaos of a holiday meal.

6. Create a Plan and Set Boundaries

A successful trip home starts with a clear plan. Make a list of what you want to do and who you want to see. Just as importantly, decide what you’ll avoid:

Are there specific people who are triggering for you?

Are there places you know you shouldn’t go?

Stick to your boundaries and pack your recovery toolbox—whether it’s bringing a trusted friend, keeping a journal, or using an app for support. Staying focused on your goals will help you navigate the trip safely and successfully.

7. Define Success in Advance

Ask yourself: What does success look like for this trip? It could be as simple as staying sober or as specific as having a calm, positive conversation with a family member. Whatever your goal, practice it beforehand.

For example, if you want to discuss your recovery journey, rehearse how you’ll communicate it. Speaking out loud allows you to refine your message and ensure it conveys respect and maturity. Leading with calmness and clarity can help others feel comfortable, paving the way for genuine connection.

8. Be Kind to Yourself

At the end of the day, remember to show yourself grace. Recovery is a challenging journey, and navigating family dynamics is no small feat. Celebrate the progress you’ve made and remind yourself of the strength it took to face these situations head-on.

If things don’t go perfectly, that’s okay too. Each step forward is a victory, no matter how small it may feel.

Final Thoughts

Returning to family gatherings in early sobriety requires preparation, intention, and self-compassion. By anticipating challenges, leaning on your support network, and staying committed to your boundaries, you can turn what might feel daunting into an empowering experience.

At Recovery Unbroken , we’re here to walk alongside you every step of the way. You’ve got this!

Heart of the matter, the heart that matters most.

Wed, 11 Dec 2024 22:45:19 GMT

"How do we ensure equal treatment and opportunities when the disease and socioeconomic factors aren't equal in affliction? "

The Converging Crises: Addiction, Mental Illness, and Homelessness in Major U.S. Cities
Across the United States, major cities are grappling with an escalating trifecta of challenges: addiction, mental illness, and homelessness. These issues are strongly intertwined, creating a complex social crisis that affects millions of individuals and imposes significant burdens on healthcare systems, law enforcement, and communities. Addressing these challenges requires a nuanced understanding of their interconnections, root causes, and potential solutions. I've been blessed to have had experiences where I've been exposed to many of these situations. I began as a 4th grader reading Bible verses for homeless men in Sioux Falls, SD to most recently spending time in Nashville, TN and the Kensington area of Philadelphia. 30 years later these social diseases are still alive and well.

The Scope of the Problem
Addiction and Substance Use Disorders
Addiction has become a defining crisis of our time, exacerbated by the opioid epidemic, increasing rates of stimulant use, and the accessibility of synthetic drugs. According to the National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA), nearly 20.4 million Americans aged 12 and older had a substance use disorder in 2019. The widespread availability of substances such as fentanyl has turned the addiction crisis into a public health emergency, with overdose deaths exceeding 100,000 annually in recent years. The statistics during COVID only escalated to the point of urgent crisis. The ages of individuals who used substances consistently has drastically got younger and younger.

Mental Illness in Urban Centers
Major cities are often hubs of economic opportunity and diversity, but they also face concentrated mental health challenges. The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) reports that nearly 1 in 5 adults in the U.S. lives with a mental illness, with urban residents particularly vulnerable due to stressors such as poverty, housing instability, and social isolation. Far too often mental health is not addressed with the same vigor and attention that substance use is, due to the nature of the urgency in many cases. This leads to obstacles in sustained recovery and happiness in every day life.

Homelessness: A National Emergency
Homelessness has reached alarming levels in U.S. cities, with approximately 653,104 individuals experiencing homelessness on any given night, according to the Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD). Major urban areas like Los Angeles, St. Louis, and Seattle report the highest numbers, with unsheltered homelessness—individuals living in encampments, vehicles, or on the streets—becoming increasingly visible. Although many major cities receive criticism for the support and management of the city's most vulnerable, the suburbs in these cities are also experiencing the needs increase that comes with the disease of addiction.

The Interconnected Nature of the Crises
Addiction and Mental Illness : A Relentless Cycle
The relationship between addiction and mental illness is complex and reciprocal. Mental health conditions, such as depression and anxiety, can lead individuals to self-medicate with drugs or alcohol, creating a pathway to addiction. Conversely, substance abuse often exacerbates or triggers mental health disorders.

For example, methamphetamine use has been linked to increased rates of psychosis, while long-term alcohol abuse can lead to severe depressive episodes. In urban environments where mental health resources are limited, this cycle frequently goes unchecked, pushing individuals further into crisis. Working with a peer for mental health or substance use will drastically decrease your chances of being unsheltered due to the recovery capital that is worked on collaboratively.

Homelessness as Both Cause and Effect
Homelessness is both a cause and consequence of addiction and mental illness. Individuals with untreated mental health conditions or substance use disorders often struggle to maintain stable housing due to unemployment, eviction, or strained relationships. Once unhoused, their vulnerabilities increase, with exposure to violence, stress, and lack of access to healthcare further deepening the spiral.

Cities such as San Francisco and Chicago illustrate this cycle vividly, where individuals living on the streets face barriers to recovery and mental health stabilization, perpetuating their homelessness.

The Role of Socioeconomic Factors
Income Inequality and Housing Costs (no relief soon)
Economic inequality and skyrocketing housing costs in cities of size play a pivotal role in homelessness. While the median household income has risen in some areas, so too have rent prices, often outpacing wage growth. For low-income individuals, a single financial setback—such as a medical bill or job loss—can result in eviction and homelessness. Entering 2025 we are experiencing financial circumstances and trends related to recovery housing that is struggling right now to find footing in support. How do we ensure equal treatment and opportunities when the disease and socioeconomic factors aren't equal in affliction?

Marginalized Communities
Racial disparities further compound the crisis. African Americans and Native Americans are disproportionately represented among the homeless population and face higher rates of mental illness and addiction. Structural inequities, including discrimination in housing, employment, and healthcare, exacerbate their vulnerability. Recovery and homelessness highlight the need to update laws and policies to empower the most suffering in cities of any size.

The Urban Response: Successes and Shortcomings
The Role of Local Governments (huge opportunity)
Cities have attempted to address these challenges through initiatives such as "Housing First" programs, which prioritize stable housing as a foundation for addressing addiction and mental health needs. Salt Lake City, for example, has seen success in reducing chronic homelessness by providing permanent supportive housing.

However, many cities struggle with insufficient funding and public resistance to such programs. Efforts to establish shelters or harm reduction facilities, such as supervised injection sites, often face "not in my backyard" (NIMBY) opposition, limiting their effectiveness. This perspective must change in order for the results and effectiveness to increase. Sticking our heads in the sand will not achieve the change we desire.

Law Enforcement and Criminalization
Law enforcement agencies are frequently the first responders to crises involving addiction and mental illness. However, policing is not a sustainable or effective solution. Criminalizing homelessness (like in Florida) and substance use often results in cycles of arrest, incarceration, and release without addressing the underlying issues.

Programs like LEAD (Law Enforcement Assisted Diversion) in Seattle aim to divert individuals from the criminal justice system into treatment and support services. Such initiatives show promise but remain underfunded and limited in scale. We should be defending our people from a disease and supporting them, not arresting them for being unhoused due to that disease. When our Country has more jails than colleges, it's obvious that unstable behavior is incentivized.

Innovative Solutions and Best Practices
Integrating Services // Recovery Unbroken
The integration of housing, addiction treatment, and mental health services is widely recognized as a best practice. Cities like Houston have adopted a coordinated approach, bringing together non-profits, healthcare providers, and government agencies to address homelessness comprehensively. Their model has successfully housed tens of thousands of individuals while providing them with access to necessary services.

Harm Reduction Strategies
Harm reduction approaches, such as needle exchange programs and naloxone distribution, have proven effective in reducing overdose deaths and the spread of infectious diseases. Vancouver’s Insite facility, a supervised injection site, has become a global model for reducing harm and connecting individuals to care. Although similar initiatives in the U.S. face legal and political hurdles, cities like New York have begun piloting these programs with positive results. Harm reduction such as MAT (medication assisted treatment) have already been proven in effectiveness and is deployed by most treatment centers.

Technology and Data-Driven Approaches
Data analytics and technology are increasingly being leveraged to address these crises. Predictive analytics can help identify individuals at risk of homelessness, allowing for early intervention. Mobile health apps and telemedicine also provide new avenues for delivering mental health care and addiction support to underserved populations.

The Human Cost
The statistics surrounding addiction, mental illness, and homelessness often overshadow the human stories behind them. Each number represents a person with aspirations, relationships, and potential. Cities must remember that these crises are not abstract problems but deeply personal ones, affecting individuals, families, and entire communities.

Call to Action
Addressing the interwoven challenges of addiction, mental illness, and homelessness requires bold leadership and innovative thinking. Policymakers, non-profits, healthcare providers, and citizens must work collaboratively to:

Expand Access to Affordable Housing: Increasing the availability of affordable housing, coupled with supportive services, is foundational to addressing homelessness.
Invest in Mental Health Services: Strengthening community-based mental health programs and ensuring access to care for vulnerable populations is crucial.
Promote Harm Reduction and Recovery: Scaling up harm reduction strategies and creating pathways to recovery can save lives and reduce long-term costs.
Tackle Structural Inequities: Addressing systemic racism and economic disparities is essential to creating equitable solutions.
As cities require intervention with these intersecting crises, a holistic, compassionate, and evidence-based approach is essential. The stakes are high, but with collective effort and innovative solutions, progress is possible. Hope is still on the table as a viable goal.

~Aaron Perry

Recovery Capital: You're the CEO!

Thu, 05 Dec 2024 21:58:54 GMT

" At Recovery Unbroken we reciprocate that commitment in our dedication to your sober outcome, mental health and the life you want to live." ~Aaron Perry

WHAT IS ALCOHOL RECOVERY CAPITAL?

Recovery capital refers to the cumulation of resources available to a peer that support their recovery from addiction. These resources can be personal, social, physical, and cultural. First address the internal, then address the external, then the circumstantial and how to navigate that. This concept recognizes that recovery is not just about abstaining from alcohol. But also, about sustaining a meaningful and fulfilling life. Recovery capital helps individuals navigate challenges, stay resilient, and achieve long-term sobriety. Plain and simple.

The term underscores the idea that recovery is influenced by several factors outside a personal willpower, including external support systems and life circumstances. Understanding and enhancing recovery capital can significantly increase the likelihood of successful outcomes. This mentality helps keep you sober!

THE FOUR PILLARS OF RECOVERY CAPITAL

Recovery capital is typically categorized into four main areas:

1. Personal Recovery Capital (Internal. Self-worth)

This includes the internal strengths and skills that an individual possesses. Examples include:

Health and Well-being: Physical health, mental health, and ACCESS to healthcare services.

Emotional Resilience: Coping mechanisms, emotional regulation, and stress management. H.A.L.T.

Education and Skills: Knowledge and abilities that enable individuals to find employment or pursue personal growth. Use a peer specialist or a recovery community!

Building personal recovery capital often involves self-reflection, therapy, and personal development. Activities such as exercising, attending 1 on 1 counseling, and learning new skills can strengthen this pillar.

2. Social Recovery Capital

Social connections and relationships play a crucial role in recovery. This pillar includes:

Family Support: Encouragement and understanding from loved ones.

Peer Support: Connections with others in recovery, such as Recovery Unbroken!

Community Networks: Access to supportive community services, such as sober living homes or recovery centers.

A strong social support system can provide encouragement, accountability, and a sense of belonging, all of which are vital for maintaining sobriety.

3. Physical Recovery Capital

Physical resources and tangible assets that make recovery more accessible fall under this category. Examples include:

Stable Housing: A safe and supportive living environment. This one is a huge growing issue that I have experience in.

Financial Resources: Savings, income, or access to financial assistance. Enjoy the savings of sobriety!

Transportation: Reliable means to access work, treatment, or support groups.

Ensuring these basic needs are met reduces stress and creates a stable foundation for recovery.

4. Cultural Recovery Capital

This refers to the societal and cultural factors that influence recovery. These include:

Stigma Reduction: Being part of a community that normalizes and supports recovery rather than shaming addiction.

Recovery-Oriented Norms: Cultural attitudes that promote health and wellness over substance use.

Access to Resources: Availability of treatment programs, recovery-friendly workplaces, and sober social spaces.

Cultural recovery capital often requires systemic changes, but individuals can benefit from participating in recovery-focused communities and advocacy efforts.

THE IMPORTANCE OF RECOVERY CAPITAL IN ALCOHOL ADDICTION

1. Predicting Long-Term Success

Studies show that individuals with higher recovery capital are more likely to achieve and sustain long-term sobriety. Recovery capital serves as a buffer against relapse by providing the tools and resources needed to manage life’s challenges without turning to alcohol.

2. Addressing Holistic Needs

Traditional treatment programs often focus solely on the physical aspects of addiction. Recovery capital emphasizes the need to address the whole person, including their social, emotional, and practical needs. This holistic approach ensures a more comprehensive and sustainable recovery process.

3. Empowerment and Resilience

Building recovery capital empowers individuals to take charge of their recovery journey. With access to resources and support, they gain the confidence and resilience needed to overcome obstacles and create a fulfilling life.

HOW TO BUILD RECOVERY CAPITAL

SEEK PROFESSIONAL HELP

Work with therapists, counselors, or sober coaches to address personal recovery capital.

Participate in structured recovery programs that incorporate social and physical resources.

Cultivate a Supportive Network

Surround yourself with people who support your sobriety, including family, friends, and recovery peers.

Join local or online support groups to connect with others who understand your journey.

Focus on Self-Care

Prioritize activities that enhance physical and mental health, such as regular exercise, a balanced diet, and mindfulness practices.

Develop healthy coping mechanisms to handle stress and emotions.

Strengthen Financial and Practical Stability

Work on budgeting, saving, and finding stable employment.

Access community resources for housing, transportation, or job training if needed.

Engage in Recovery-Oriented Activities

Volunteer, attend sober social events, or participate in advocacy efforts to promote recovery-friendly norms.

Explore hobbies or passions that bring joy and purpose to your life.

Educate Yourself and Others

Learn about addiction and recovery to better understand your journey.

Share your story to help reduce stigma and inspire others.

Recovery Capital and Society

While individuals can work on building their recovery capital, society also plays a crucial role. Communities can:

Expand Access to Treatment: Ensure that quality care is affordable and accessible to all.

Foster Recovery-Friendly Environments: Create workplaces, schools, and social spaces that support sobriety.

Reduce Stigma: Educate the public about addiction as a disease and celebrate recovery stories.

By addressing systemic barriers and promoting a recovery-oriented culture, we can help individuals build the capital they need to succeed.

Conclusion

Recovery from alcohol addiction requires more than determination; it requires access to a wide range of resources and support systems. Recovery capital provides a comprehensive framework for understanding and enhancing these resources, making long-term sobriety achievable and fulfilling.

Whether you’re in recovery or supporting someone who is, focusing on building recovery capital can transform the journey into a sustainable and rewarding experience. When you’re building something as important and long lasting as recovery, investment is needed. At Recovery Unbroken we reciprocate that commitment in our dedication to your sober outcome, mental health and the life you want to live.

~Aaron Perry

Modern day recovery

Tue, 29 Oct 2024 17:44:02 GMT

"Peer support is especially helpful because it provides individuals with role models who have achieved lasting sobriety and can share advice on how to overcome common obstacles."

The landscape of alcoholism recovery has evolved significantly in recent years. In 2024, recovering from alcohol use disorder (AUD) involves more than just attending support groups or relying on willpower; it’s a comprehensive journey with personalized tools, resources, and support networks that empower individuals to reclaim their lives. With advancements in digital health, mental health awareness, and addiction science, people struggling with alcoholism have more effective recovery pathways available than ever before.

Peer support groups, both in-person and online, create spaces where people can speak openly about their experiences. Peer support is especially helpful because it provides individuals with role models who have achieved lasting sobriety and can share advice on how to overcome common obstacles.

Key Trends and Resources in Alcohol Recovery in 2024

Today, alcohol recovery embraces a holistic approach that includes not only physical detox but also mental, emotional, and social healing. Here are some prominent trends in alcohol recovery today:

1. Digital Recovery Platforms and Apps (Recovery Unbroken!)

Digital health tools are revolutionizing addiction recovery, allowing people to access support, track their progress, and receive therapeutic guidance right from their smartphones. Joining an actual community is key. Recording for others on Tik Tok is not community. Sharing for 5 minutes at an AA meeting is not community. Virtual connection is the glue holding recovery together in 2024.

When you're having a craving "go find a meeting" isn't real advice. Your community is at your fingertips 24/7 and led by professionals.

2. Teletherapy and Remote Counseling

Teletherapy has transformed mental health care, making counseling and addiction therapy accessible to individuals regardless of geographic location. Through teletherapy, people in recovery can schedule sessions with licensed therapists and addiction specialists without the added stress of commuting or time constraints. Therapy options such as motivational interviewing (MI), dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), and mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR) are commonly used to address the underlying mental health conditions that often accompany AUD, such as anxiety, depression, trauma and bipolar.

Remote counseling has also enabled loved ones to be more involved in the recovery process. Family therapy sessions over video calls can help repair relationships strained by addiction, providing a crucial support system that encourages individuals to stay committed to sobriety.

3. Medication-Assisted Treatment (MAT)

While MAT has been around for a while, its accessibility and effectiveness have improved significantly in recent years. MAT involves using medications such as naltrexone, acamprosate, and disulfiram to help reduce cravings and block the rewarding effects of alcohol. In 2024, these medications are available in both oral and injectable forms, allowing patients more flexibility and control over their treatment.

Medications in combination with therapy have shown a high success rate in maintaining sobriety for individuals with severe AUD. MAT can reduce the risk of relapse, lessen withdrawal symptoms, and offer individuals a solid foundation as they work through their recovery journey. The side effects of these medications have been very little and not altering your day to day life.

4. Community-Based Support and Sober Living Communities

Sober living communities and structured living environments continue to play an important role in recovery. These communities provide alcohol-free environments where individuals can live with others who are also committed to sobriety. Sober living homes often have strict no-alcohol policies and require regular attendance at support meetings, creating a structured lifestyle that promotes healthy routines and peer accountability.

Online and in-person communities are evolving daily. Investing in your recovery is not only a sound financial decision, it's one that could save your life.. In 2024, online support groups have expanded beyond the antiquated traditional AA model, incorporating groups specifically for women, LGBTQ+ individuals, veterans, and young adults. By providing safe spaces that address the unique experiences of each demographic, community-based support networks foster greater inclusivity and understanding in recovery. Recovery requires engagement and interaction, not just a recital in a quiet church basement.

5. Focus on Holistic Well-being: Mind, Body, and Spirit

In 2024, the concept of holistic recovery, which addresses the mind, body, and spirit, has become a central theme. Techniques such as mindfulness meditation, yoga, exercise, and healthy eating are recognized as essential parts of recovery. Mindfulness helps individuals gain control over their thoughts and emotions, reducing the likelihood of relapse by making it easier to manage stress and cravings. In Recovery Unbroken we focus a lot of meditation, creativity and social well-being.

Navigating Challenges in Recovery

Despite the many advances in recovery resources, challenges still remain. Relapse is common and can be emotionally devastating. However, recovery experts emphasize that relapse should be seen as a learning experience rather than a failure. Today’s programs are designed to help individuals bounce back from setbacks and reevaluate their strategies, reinforcing the concept of progress over perfection. At Recovery Unbroken there is not shame, or stigma or judgement. Slips happen, it's what you do the next day that matters.

The Role of Family and Social Support in Recovery

Family support can make a significant difference in recovery outcomes. Therapy and counseling for family members help them understand addiction’s complexities, reducing blame or shame and fostering a more supportive environment. Families are encouraged to educate themselves about AUD, participate in therapy, and offer nonjudgmental support, which can increase the individual’s sense of connection and resilience. Recovery Unbroken addresses family dynamics and has meetings dedicated to this topic.

Alcohol Recovery in 2024: A Personalized Journey

Recovery from alcoholism in 2024 is more personalized, accessible, and integrated than ever before. Treatment options are highly customizable, and individuals are encouraged to create recovery plans that align with their unique needs, values, and goals. From digital platforms to in-person support networks, people have a wealth of resources available to build a recovery plan that works best for them.

In an era where technology meets compassion, alcoholism recovery is evolving to meet people where they are, making it possible to not only overcome addiction but to create a fulfilling life that extends beyond sobriety. With increased acceptance and access to diverse tools, individuals in recovery today are better equipped to maintain their sobriety, repair relationships, and rediscover their true selves. For anyone embarking on or continuing the journey, 2024 offers a hopeful and resilient path to long-term healing and well-being.

To take that step and join, click HERE.

Save Me

Fri, 30 Aug 2024 04:13:31 GMT

"Seeing a way out of it seemed nearly impossible"

“Somebody save me, me from myself. I’ve spent so long living in hell”.

Many of Us in recovery , especially early recovery have what we call our “drunk voice” which is that voice in the back of our head that gets very loud at times.

My “drunk voice” can pretty much be summed up into one song. “Save Me” by Jellyroll and Lainey Wilson .

“I’m a lost cause, baby don’t waste your time on me”

By the summer of 2022 that is exactly what my “drunk voice” was telling me. I realized that my mental health was quickly declining because my alcohol consumption was drastically increasing. Seeing a way out of it seemed nearly impossible and highly unlikely. It’s still common to justify disordered drinking because we live in a world where alcohol is glorified as a remedy to save someone. The truth is, that is a lie.

“All of my sorrows I just wash them down. It’s the only peace I’ve ever found”

Washing out my sorrows by numbing my pain with alcohol was the only way to get through the day. I didn’t know how to “sit in my feelings” and sure as hell didn’t have any “ sobriety toolbox ” to help me.

“I’m so damaged beyond repair. Life has shattered my hopes and my dreams”

After my cries for help fell on deaf ears I just got tired of being tired. I got tired of waking up hungover. I got tired of disappointing others and myself. I needed to make a change . I needed to get my mental health under control and with that, my drinking.

“Something inside of me is broken”

It takes time to get comfortable with getting or being sober, years even. What I know now is that recovery is not going to be handed to me. It takes work . It takes community . It takes a perseverance and commitment to myself that I can never break.

The greatest thing that sobriety has taught me over the last 23 months is that I am no longer “damaged”. I am no longer a “lost cause” and where life was once “shattered”, it is now filled with a lot of “hope” and many “dreams”.

Good luck with your journey ~ Donna

Finding your Tribe

Thu, 25 Jul 2024 22:55:21 GMT

"Sober communities now look different to each person in recovery"

Finding your tribe

It’s no secret that as you get older finding new people and friends to connect with gets harder, especially as your children get older and school parents drift apart. Now add in the dimension of getting or being sober and that at times seems like it’s damn near impossible. However in sobriety the absolute key to success is finding community.

Sober communities now look different to each person in recovery. Gone are the days where your sober community only comes from anonymous meetings in church basements or groups you reside in treatment with. Social media has opened up the world to possibility and allowed for strangers around the world to become lifelong friends.

If someone had told me two years ago that my best friend would be a retired grandmother from Idaho or that my boyfriend lived in Minnesota I would have thought that you had gone mad. But today, Cathy is my biggest confidant and Aaron is the true love of my life. Together the three of us run Recovery Unbroken, an online peer to peer sober support group. The Recovery Unbroken (RU) community has saved my life and allowed me to not just survive but thrive in recovery.

It’s no secret that I got sober through TikTok . What started out for me as an app that I would watch home cooks and puppy videos during the pandemic became my inspiration to live a life without alcohol. The sober community on TikTok is large and extremely supportive. Never in a million years could I have imagined that I would know people from all over the world and we would be a part of each other’s sober journey. It is truly using technology and social media to not only save our own lives but helping others to save their own.

Find what inspires you to get and stay sober , you won’t regret it.

If you’re looking for community, check out Recovery Unbroken. You will not regret it.

Good luck with your journey.

~ Donna

Where's the party?

Sun, 21 Jul 2024 15:32:21 GMT

"Every single time that I tell someone that I got sober because of TikTok, they do a double take."

Have you ever bought alcohol at the store and the worker asks “where’s the party”?

Have you ever lied about that answer because it was just for you?

Have you ever pulled into your driveway coming home from a picnic grateful to put the car in park? Relief washing over you because you did make it home safely even though you had several beers in the hot sun all day….

Have you ever woken up after a night of drinking with extreme anxiety not remembering how you acted last night or even how you got home?

Have you ever lost your purse or cell phone because you didn’t realize late night that you left it in the Uber or at the bar?

Have you ever deleted a social media post in the morning because when you looked back at it you realized that it made zero sense?

Have you answered Yes to any of these questions or have these questions made you uncomfortable?

Don’t worry, me too.

The hardest person to admit that you have a problem with alcohol or that it may be getting out of control is to yourself. It takes great strength to look at yourself in the mirror and say out loud “I need to quit drinking”. Nobody can make you quit drinking. You can’t quit for your kids, your spouse, your job or even the law. You have to want to get sober and stay sober for yourself.

There are so many routes to getting sober. Nowadays there is an entire world that has been opened up through social media to help. Connection is key. They say that the opposite of addiction is connection. Every single time that I tell someone that I got sober because of TikTok, they do a double take. There has not been one person who didn’t flinch or smile jokingly when I say that. I actually love watching their face because it reminds me how special and amazing the experience has been.

Sobriety is the greatest gift that I have ever given myself. If someone had told me two years ago that I would love being sober, I would have never believed them. But here we are. I love being sober and the blessings that have been given to me because of my recovery.

Try sobriety, I have literally nothing to lose except the booze. START HERE

You can do it. You are worth it. Put yourself first and do it for You.

Good luck with your journey.

~ Donna

Taking Stock

Thu, 11 Jul 2024 15:57:23 GMT

"The dividends are robust"

Taking Stock

I’m not talking about the stock exchange, I mean taking stock of your sobriety progress. Wherever you are, day 1, month 2 or 2 years, I believe it’s important to pause every once in a while and say or think this: “take a look at me now”.

I’m at the tail end of a two week vacation from work, an extended 4th of July holiday. As I reflect back on this time, I’ve done a lot of great things; birthday parties, a fun concert, beach days, BBQ's, walks, coffee shop visits, errands, cleaning, gardening. And all of these activities were done sober. A year and a half ago, the majority of those events would have included some or in most cases, a lot of alcohol. In early sobriety, this proved to be immensely challenging for me. Time off from work meant escaping with booze, in a big way. Did I think about drinking during this recent time off, yes, but it was a blip on the radar. In fact, it passed so quickly that I was able to simply live in the present and enjoy the activity at the time. Was I completely at peace always, no, but the clarity that sobriety provides allows me to go through emotions easier. No drunk logic or convoluted hangover anxiety thinking.

When this break from work ends in a few days, I’ll be rested, more content and ready to tackle work, life and relationship tasks whether they’re positive or negative. This is a sharp contrast to the past where it would have taken a week plus to detox and be centered in mind, body and spirit. And guess what, when I did recover, I did it all again that next weekend. I’m so grateful to have jumped off that Merry Go Round.

I’m a fan of taking stock. The dividends are robust.

Chuck W

I'm sorry Kevin Bacon

Tue, 02 Jul 2024 16:02:48 GMT

I really need to apologize to Kevin Bacon.

Yup, I’m talking about THAT Kevin Bacon.

In September of 2022, I was in the Austin airport waiting for my flight home to Jersey and passing the time in the United Lounge. I was enjoying their free breakfast with open bar and I was already several glasses of wine in. Nothing says “classy” like pairing buffet style scrambled eggs with cheep Pino grigio at 10:30 in the morning. But, I was about to get on a plane so I had to have some wine to counter my fear of flying. So this behavior was complexly justified in my mind. Not that I ever felt the need to justify my drinking, regardless of how excessive or inappropriate it was.

As I was leaving to go to the gate none other than Kevin Bacon walks right past me. Now, here I am with the opportunity to tell him that he is one of my favorite actors. Or maybe I would tell him that I loved him in every movie he has ever been in (except “sleepers” of course, hated him in that movie but that was to be expected) or maybe I would tell him that I too am an Eagles fan or that I love watching his TikToks where he sings to his goats. I say NONE of these things.

Instead, with this American Treasure standing less than a foot away from me my drunk ass screams in his face “IS THAT KEVIN BACON”? He politely nodded and was whisked away. But not before I screamed again “I LOVE HIM” to which he politely nodded again and entered through a door to get away from the crowd, and people like me.

I was MORTIFIED.

For the entire rest of the day all I talked about was how I screamed “IS THAT KEVIN BACON” in Kevin Bacon’s face. I must have told that story twenty times over the course of the weekend.

Here I had had the opportunity to tell one of my favorite actors of all time how talented and entertaining he is and how much I appreciate his craft and his work. But no, I scream in his face like an asshole.

Little did I know then that I would get sober two days later and have my last drink on 9/25/22.

This encounter replayed in my mind for weeks as yet another reminder of how alcohol altered by judgement and how I didn’t want to behave anymore. I decided that I wanted to do better and be better….so I did just that.

In the last 21 months of my sobriety I have probably flown sober 40 times. There has not one time where I have not thought about that encounter and how disrespectful I was to that man and what a fool I made out of myself.

So, Mr. Bacon, I apologize.

My Law

Fri, 14 Jun 2024 15:16:41 GMT

"viewing alcohol as the poison that it legitimately is, allows me to stick to my “law” without romanticizing drinking."

When a woman gets pregnant they are told lots of things, but most times the big one is that she cannot drink until the baby is born. Most women don’t have a problem with this because it’s just a nonnegotiable “law”. Baby comes first, so that glass of wine or IPA will have to wait nine months. The health and safety of the baby is top priority and most pregnant women don’t have an issue with not being “allowed” to drink. I didn’t have an issue not drinking when I was pregnant with either of my kids. The thought of ingesting alcohol (which we know is a poison) and passing it along to the growing baby inside us is inconceivable. When pregnant, we put our child first and our need to relax or cope with a drink second. It’s just the “law”.

However, somewhere around month eight or nine (in many cases) the question of "when can I drink"? starts to creep into our thoughts. If a mother chooses to breastfeed, that countdown drink may be a little longer than originally anticipated. Either way, it’s ok because it’s the law that you can’t drink for the health and safety of the baby.

So when does this law get lifted or eventually flat out ignored?

When is it ok to drink again?

When is the health and safety of the child no longer front and center of a law over alcohol? When you have an infant that relays on you 100%? When you have a toddler and they are now mobile and getting into things? When a child is elementary school age and old enough to know that that drink sometimes “makes mommy act funny”? Or is it ok to drink when you have teenagers who are watching you get drunk when you are telling them to “just say no”?

Truth is, it’s really not ok for my kids to see me drink, period! Unfortunately this is something that I learned about 16 years too late.

My kids, now 16 and 19 have seen me drink, a little and then excessively at times. They have seen me act a fool. They have seen me relax with friends with bottles of wine piling up on the kitchen table among us Moms. They have seen me “fall asleep” during Wheel of Fortune. My kids have heard me say things that I didn’t remember in the morning. My kids have seen me drive when something inside them probably made them scared and feel like this wasn’t a good idea. My kids have needed me and couldn’t count on me because it was after 7pm and I was “done” for the night.

For these reasons and too many more to count I live with extreme guilt and shame that may take me years to process through. Many people say that the only regret they have about getting sober is that they didn’t do it sooner. I have that same regret. But I can’t live in regrets, I can only live in the present. This is why staying sober and not drinking has now become my law. This is the one personal law that I must stay vigilant about and that I can never break.

Staying sober because of my law reduces many urges that I would normally have to drink. Now viewing alcohol as the poison that it legitimately is, allows me to stick to my law without romanticizing drinking. I have taken back the power that I allowed alcohol to have over me for too many years. I am putting the health and safety of my children, along with my own, back in the front and center where it belongs.

And I’m ok with it. In fact, I am more than ok with it. I actually welcome this new “law” into my life. Because, in the last twenty months of sobriety I have reaped the benefits of giving up alcohol tenfold. I know how proud my kids are that I don’t drink. They tell me often and loudly how proud they are of me for being sober. I can’t change the past, but I sure as hell stick to my law in the future.

Good luck with your journey.

Donna

A Passport of Acceptance

Fri, 07 Jun 2024 21:27:07 GMT

"it involves letting go of the struggle against reality and finding peace within it"

Radical Acceptance and Alcohol Recovery: Embracing Change for Lasting Sobriety

Alcohol recovery is a challenging journey that often involves confronting deep-seated emotions, past traumas, and significant life changes. One powerful tool that can aid in this process is radical acceptance. This concept, rooted in Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), involves fully accepting reality as it is, rather than fighting against it or denying it. Embracing radical acceptance can be transformative in the context of alcohol recovery, providing a foundation for lasting sobriety and personal growth.

Understanding Radical Acceptance

Radical acceptance is about acknowledging and embracing the present moment without judgment. It means recognizing that certain situations or feelings are beyond our control and accepting them as they are. This doesn't mean approving of negative situations or resigning oneself to them, but rather, it involves letting go of the struggle against reality and finding peace within it.

The Role of Radical Acceptance in Alcohol Recovery

For many individuals struggling with alcohol addiction, denial and resistance are common coping mechanisms. These can manifest as denial of the severity of the addiction, resistance to treatment, or refusal to acknowledge underlying issues such as trauma or mental health conditions. Radical acceptance can break these patterns by fostering a mindset of openness and acceptance.

Acknowledging the Problem:

The first step in recovery is often the hardest: admitting that there is a problem. Radical acceptance encourages individuals to confront their addiction head-on, acknowledging the impact it has had on their lives and the lives of those around them. This honest self-assessment is crucial for seeking help and beginning the recovery process.

Accepting Past and Present Circumstances:

Many people with alcohol addiction have experienced significant trauma or adversity. Radical acceptance involves recognizing these past events without judgment and accepting the emotions they evoke. This can reduce the emotional burden of carrying unresolved pain and provide a clearer path to healing.

Letting Go of Control:

A common struggle in addiction recovery is the desire to control every aspect of one’s life and environment. Radical acceptance teaches individuals to accept that they cannot control everything, particularly the actions and reactions of others. This can lead to a significant reduction in stress and anxiety, which are often triggers for substance use.

Practical Steps to Implement Radical Acceptance in Recovery

Mindfulness Practices:

Mindfulness and meditation are powerful tools for practicing radical acceptance. These practices encourage staying present in the moment and observing thoughts and feelings without judgment. Regular mindfulness practice can help individuals become more aware of their emotions and reactions, making it easier to accept them.

Therapeutic Support:

Working with a therapist trained in DBT can provide structured guidance in implementing radical acceptance. Therapy sessions can offer a safe space to explore difficult emotions and develop strategies for acceptance and coping ( Wikipedia ).

Journaling:

Keeping a journal can be an effective way to process thoughts and emotions. Writing down experiences and reflecting on them can help individuals identify areas where they are struggling to accept reality and work through these challenges in a constructive manner.

Support Groups:

Joining support groups such as Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) can provide a sense of community and shared experience. Hearing others’ stories of acceptance and recovery can be inspiring and reinforce the principles of radical acceptance.

Benefits of Radical Acceptance in Recovery

Reduced Emotional Distress:

By accepting emotions and situations as they are, individuals can reduce the intensity of negative emotions such as anger, frustration, and sadness. This can decrease the urge to use alcohol as a coping mechanism.

Improved Relationships:

Acceptance of oneself and others can lead to healthier and more authentic relationships. Letting go of the need to control others or harbor resentment can pave the way for more meaningful connections.

Increased Resilience:

Embracing radical acceptance builds emotional resilience. It equips individuals with the ability to face challenges and setbacks without reverting to destructive behaviors.

Radical acceptance is a powerful concept that can significantly enhance the alcohol recovery journey. By embracing reality as it is and letting go of the struggle against it, individuals can find peace, reduce emotional distress, and build a solid foundation for lasting sobriety. Incorporating practices such as mindfulness, therapy, journaling, and support groups can help cultivate this mindset, leading to profound personal growth and a healthier, sober life.

Joys of Recovery

Thu, 06 Jun 2024 14:58:58 GMT

"With a clear mind, individuals can think more rationally, make better decisions, and plan for the future."

The Joy of Alcohol Recovery: Embracing a New Beginning

Recovering from alcohol addiction is a transformative journey that goes beyond just quitting drinking. It’s about rediscovering personal self, reclaiming control over life, and finding joy in the small and big things. The process of recovery can be challenging, but the rewards are profound and far-reaching, impacting not just the individual but also their family, friends, and community. Here’s a guided look at the manifold joys that come with alcohol recovery.

Rediscovering Physical Health

One of the most immediate benefits of alcohol recovery is the improvement in physical health. Alcohol takes a drastic toll on the body, affecting the liver, heart, brain, and other organs. When you stop drinking, your body begins to heal. Liver function improves, blood pressure stabilizes, and the risk of alcohol-related diseases decreases. For many, this physical transformation brings a newfound energy and vitality. Simple activities like going for a run, enjoying a meal, or even just waking up without a hangover become sources of joy. Hold on dearly to these physical joys.

Reconnecting with Emotions

Alcohol often numbs emotions, creating a barrier between individuals and their true feelings. In recovery, people learn to reconnect with their emotions in a healthy way. This reconnection can be overwhelming at first, but it ultimately leads to a richer, more authentic life. Feeling emotions deeply—whether joy, sadness, anger, or love—means living fully. Embracing these feelings allows for personal growth and the development of deeper, more meaningful relationships. Alcohol leads to isolation, recovery leads to connection.

Building Stronger Relationships

Addiction can strain and sometimes sever relationships with family and friends. Recovery offers a chance to rebuild these connections, as appropriate. As trust is restored and communication improves, relationships can become stronger and more supportive than ever before. The joy of being truly present with loved ones, sharing experiences, and creating new memories and moments is immeasurable. Many in recovery find that they gain not just back their old relationships but also form new, healthier connections with others who understand and support their journey. Recovery will surround you with people who make you happy, alcohol will immerse you in influences designed to make you unhappy.

Discovering New Passions

Recovery provides the opportunity to explore interests and passions that may have been neglected or undiscovered during active addiction. Whether it’s picking up an old hobby, discovering a new talent, or dedicating time to volunteer work, these activities can bring immense joy and fulfillment. They also serve as positive distractions and coping mechanisms, helping to keep the mind focused and engaged.

Achieving Personal Goals

Setting and achieving goals is a significant part of the recovery process. These goals can be as varied as completing an educational course, securing a job, running a marathon, or simply maintaining sobriety one day at a time. Each accomplishment, no matter how small, is a victory that boosts self-esteem and motivation. The sense of pride and joy that comes from achieving these goals is a powerful reminder of one’s strength and resilience.

Mental Clarity and Peace

Alcohol addiction often leads to mental fog, anxiety, and depression. Recovery, on the other hand, brings mental clarity and emotional stability. With a clear mind, individuals can think more rationally, make better decisions, and plan for the future. Meditation, mindfulness, and other therapeutic practices often play a crucial role in maintaining this mental clarity, contributing to a sense of inner peace and well-being.

Spiritual Growth

For many, recovery is also a spiritual journey. It’s a time to reflect on life’s purpose, connect with a higher power, and cultivate inner peace. Spiritual growth can take many forms, from traditional religious practices to personal spiritual explorations. This aspect of recovery can provide a deep sense of fulfillment and joy, offering comfort and guidance during challenging times.

Giving Back

One of the most rewarding aspects of recovery is the opportunity to give back. Many who have struggled with addiction choose to support others on their journey to sobriety. Whether through formal roles like counseling or informal acts of kindness and mentorship, helping others can be incredibly fulfilling. It’s a way to turn past struggles into positive contributions, fostering a sense of purpose and community,

In the end

The journey of alcohol recovery is not just about abstaining from alcohol; it’s about embracing a new way of living. The joys of recovery are multifaceted, touching on physical health, emotional well-being, personal achievements, and spiritual growth. Each day of sobriety brings new opportunities for happiness and fulfillment, making the recovery journey a truly transformative experience. The time for transformation is upon us, in fact, you can START HERE.

5 Must See Recovery Movies

Tue, 04 Jun 2024 15:35:51 GMT

"we own and are known for our moments"

Art can imitate life. And the art of film has inspired us with stories of hope, struggle, trial and redemption. The characters portrayed in motion pictures transform the view into the human psyche that is vivid enough for all to recognize the pain, as well as why our milestones matter. Aren't those two things that want others to understand about us? Movies are used in treatment settings to help keep the attention of clients while also driving home the point of recovery, and most importantly, what a healthy positive recovery outcome looks like in art form. This leads to the development of our personal vision of what our comeback looks like. It inspires action, tempers reactions and creates an energy tied to a mission. It's really something to lean into.

There are thankfully dozens of great films about recovery. Here are 5 that I've seen, that have helped me and that I recommend to clients I work with as a Peer Recovery Specialist.

"FLIGHT" : 2012 . Denzel Washington. Amazing true story which is very accurate in the mindset of a struggling alcoholic fighting to hold it all together. In class Denzel fashion, you want to hate his character but feel empathy for him as well.

"FOUR GOOD DAYS" 2020: Mila Kunis and Glenn Close. Easily my favorite movie of Mila Kunis. For anyone unfamiliar with the medication treatment for harder drugs, this movie explains the basics very well and why staying clean is just so important. And why it's always good policy to ask for help, and help those when they are brave enough to ask.

"A STAR IS BORN" 2018" Bradley Cooper & Lady Gaga. I'm sure most have seen this popular remake but it highlights a few things I wish were most obvious. First is that leaving treatment is super hard. It's not really a "graduation". It's an ejection seat into the scary real and tempting world that is largely oblivious to our needs. The other is, check on people when they're quiet. Even if they are usually quiet, they are still deserving of our active caring.

"A MILLION LITTLE PIECES" 2019: Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Charlie Hunnam. This movie was first shown to me in residential treatment. It really impacted me so I always share it. This picture is sad, very real, and could be triggering. It really details how truly difficult simple tasks are. There is a scene where the main character goes to the dentist and it shows his pain and mental battle to fight cravings. It's well done.

"COUNTRY STRONG" 2010: Gwyneth Paltrow, Garret Hedlund, Tim McGraw. I know this one is a curveball. But the themes in it are worth noting. I find in recovery that I, and many, have rushed back to work in the past. We're wired to think we're not contributing unless we are earning. That simply isn't true at all. Rushing back to work is kryptonite for sustainable recovery. In this movie the main character is rushed back to the stage far too soon. She is led back to where trauma occurred, which is a cruel turn of events. And as love can do, it complicates and thwarts the main character's stability leading to a demise. I won't ruin the ending for you but among the great music, there are recovery lessons to be learned in this movie.

Whatever we use for inspiration, we all have the solace that we define and refine our story. We aren't handcuffed by a script and our personal character is our passport to living a life worth celebrating and remembering. We know the actors I mentioned above because of movies. but the beauty of us is that we own and are known for our moments. Go out and make your moments.

Aaron

Get Sober. Stay Sober. Start Here.

Do you smell smoke?

Mon, 03 Jun 2024 15:12:38 GMT

"enjoying the new life i've created for myself"

Do you smell smoke?

No one ever wants to be asked that question as they sit in their dining room. The events that happened after my house fire on 10/5/18 are a blur but one thing I can say with complete confidence is that the impact that this event on had on my drinking was in fact monumental.

Later that night I was sitting at a Holiday Inn bar, I had just watched my house burn from a dryer fire and smoke come out of my young children’s bedroom windows (fortunately they had not been home at the time). I remember putting my head down on the bar telling the bartender that my house just had a fire and she empathize with me by giving me endless glasses of white wine, on the house of course. I was now homeless, living at a Holiday Inn and completely unsure of what the future held for me or where my children and I would live. For the next several weeks I found myself sitting at that same bar all hours of the day. It was completely justified in my mind to drink excessively because it was the only thing that I could control at that point in my life. I couldn’t control the Insurance Company . I couldn’t control where I live at the moment. I could only control “numbing out”.

Eventually we moved into a rental and attempted to get settled while I figured out how to rebuild. Rebuilding took three years, five moves and money I didn’t have at the time. Add in a worldwide Covid lockdown, unemployment, building a new home, family health scares and kids mental health decline. So, I drank. By the time we moved back into our new house in July 2021 my drinking had crossed the line of excessive and now I had to hid it.

This was also a time for celebration that we were “finally settled”. And how did I celebrate this “wonderful” news? By drinking, throwing extravagant themed dinners & parties (with the coordinating outfits to match) and ignoring my even more declining mental health. Now I was mentally in a place where I thought I could “buy my way to happiness”. Of course I didn’t actually realize any of this at the time, I just drank to “celebrate”.

My “celebration era” came to a SCREECHING halt on 3/24/22 when one of my family members became critically ill. How did I handle this stress and pressure? I drank and mentally spiraled into a VERY dark hole.

Six months later, my rock bottom hit. My relationship with my kids and my significant other had TANKED and I knew that if I didn’t get my mental health under control there would be devastating consequences. So, on 9/25/22 I had my last sips (more like chugs) of several bottles of Cavit Pino Grigio and committed to improving my mental health.

Getting sober was the single hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. It’s so easy to “numb”, it’s not easy to “feel”. However, what I have learned in the last twenty months of sobriety is that no matter what life throws at me, no matter how difficult of a situation I am in, no matter what comes next in my life…..alcohol is never going to fix it, improve it or make it better.

Now my goal is to stay sober so I can keep reminding myself of this when life throws me the next crisis. In the meantime I am present for and enjoying the new life that I have created for myself.

Good luck with your journey

Donna

Becoming my authentic self.

Fri, 17 May 2024 17:07:23 GMT

Authentic recovery to discover self

600 days ago I decided I didn’t want to live as a depressed, anxious, overweight and heartbroken 46-year-old single mom with feelings of despair, loneliness and hopelessness.

To the outside world it appeared that I “had it all”, but the reality was that I was dying inside and if I didn’t change something immediately, that battle wouldn’t have lasted much longer.

I wanted to live a better life. Deep down somewhere I knew that I deserved to live a better life. I also knew that it would not come easy to me nor should it for the greatest things in life take hard work.

I wanted to live a life full of hope and love and light. I just had no idea how to get there. I knew that something had to change. I knew that something had to be different. I knew that I had to change to become different. I needed to find out who “Donna” really was in order to do that. The “Donna” that I thought I had known for a long time was actually riddled with anxiety and depression and dulled by the poison of alcohol. 600 days ago, I made the choice to get my mental health under control and with that, get sober. If you had asked me 599 days ago if this was even remotely possible, I wouldn’t have given it a second thought. But, today as I reflect back on the past 600 days and the journey that I am now on, I couldn’t be more grateful. September 25, 2022, needed to be my last day of drinking in order to save myself and become who I am meant to be.

It’s easy to sit here and talk about when I was drinking, but the truth is everybody has the same stories. Some of us just articulate them better or worse than others. We all can reminisce about the drunk black outs, poor decision, regretful conversations, harmful situations we put ourselves in, shameful stories, and lost potential. HOWEVER, the true power of a person is seeing, understanding and knowing what your potential can be. I don’t want to define myself by shameful or regretful stories. I wanted to define myself by the hope that lives in my heart for a better future.

Finding the balance between not “forgetting where I came from” and “where do I want to be” takes patience, self-forgiveness, humility and grace. Becoming my true authentic self has not been easy, nor am I done, but it’s been worth it.

This is what I have discovered so far on my journey of becoming my true authentic self.

I am capable of doing hard things. I have always thought this, but I had never in my life actually done it without coping with alcohol. Even though I had gone through a divorce, buried my dad, financial success and failures, a house fire, single mom of toddlers, lost jobs, have a child on the Autism spectrum and mentally ill family members and more, I had never faced or dealt with any of this without alcohol and depression spiraling my mental health out of control.

I’m capable of (and now welcome) sitting in my feelings, good and bad. Whether I want to or not. Yes, the “hurts” hurt more, that’s for sure, but the love I feel now knows no boundaries.

I actually have more fun than I’ve ever had in my life. I dance at parties. I laugh more. I love more. I have more confidence. I’m just as corny and still a huge dork at times.

I am deserving of equal and real love. Most of all I now know that I deserve more than feeling like I am disposable. I have always been the one in my relationships to love more, to give more and to tolerate more. I now know my true worth and have found someone who values me just as much as I value myself.

I am by no means perfect or even done doing the inner work that is needed to grow more, but I at least started and on my way. My smile now is real. I am happy. I know that I am lovable. I know that no matter what life throws at me, alcohol is not the answer to the problem.

Good luck with your journey.

When the work you put in saves your life: True Story

Thu, 02 May 2024 17:27:03 GMT

There are moments, both amazing and traumatic that tattoo our mind. May is Mental Health Awareness Month and I want to share an experience I haven't before that I can point to a moment and say "that's when I started loving myself again.

Rewind to March of 2022. I was reading a book that changed my life. It's "10% Happier" by Dan Harris . He is a newsman turned now, thankfully, a mental health expert. He details his life, his work which is fascinating, stories and warzones he's covered and especially the time he had a panic attack on-air. He had always doubted meditation and anything mental health related but he needed a new dimension. A new tool, train of thought, habits and a healthy routine established the right way. In the book he recalls the time Diane Sawyer gave him some flack for changing his thought on meditation. He said "it makes me 10% happier".

Of ALL places where did I read this book, Milwaukee County Jail 3C. Going through PAWS (post alcohol withdrawals syndrome) in the most rambunctious young loud cell block in the state of Wisconsin is not exactly prime for a mental health read. Or was it exactly what I needed? As you might imagine there are disagreements galore when you segregate a population in need of stability. That's my nice way of saying it's truly hell on earth. One morning while jawing back and forth with a 18 year old kid over who gets the phone next, as I'm speaking with my Mom, this kid spits straight in my face. There! THAT was the moment. I have to hit him right? All 49 others and the correctional officer are looking at me. I have to stand up for myself right?

I stood up for myself that day and it altered my thinking going forward forever.

No I didn't hit him. I swiped his saliva from my nose, eyes and forehead and told my Mom everything was fine. She knew I wasn't fine but I didn't tell her what had just happened. I finished my phone call and made a decision to see how far humility can take me. I told the officer everything was fine, I lied and said he didn't spit on me. And I apologized to the kid for the hurtful things I had said to him. He went back to all his friends shocked and said "he's cool, give him the phone when he wants". I stood up for myself by somehow finding grace that day. See punching someone is an automatic 2 years. And in fact spitting on someone also carries a 2 year sentence. Had I hit him, I'm not writing this blog, I'm not raising my kids or working. I'd be on the wrong side of the statistics, all because of that moment. I didn't hit him, because I love myself. I forgave him and apologized first because I could then show love and grace to others.

When the work you put in saves your life I feel compelled to share the how and why. The power of a real apology is liberating. I took a chance that day that the work was worth it. It was, it is, and always will be worth it. Invest in yourself, join us today .

Life's Puzzle

Thu, 25 Apr 2024 00:01:38 GMT

everything happens for a reason

We all roam this life knowing just a fraction of what someone else goes through. Early in my recovery I was released from the county jail system and sober just 7 months. My only exposure to real recovery were the AA meetings I led myself while incarcerated. I remember walking to a restaurant and had a mind so fragile, I was on high alert from a fight or flight perspective. I didn't even remember how to enjoy freedom and wanted to run away. I know no one knew that I hung on with everything I had and made it through that. Because I'm sharing it here for the first time. The freedom felt by processing experiences and correcting them is infectious. It's part of what sets Recovery Unbroken apart.

The early days of managing our sobriety is very testing. So is managing a mental illness on top of that. It's very easy to measure when we have a true panic attack, it's no joke. So we should also feel the peace that comes with the work we put in and toughness we exude to rid ourselves of panic and mania. Addiction certainly is a disease but what we choose to do with that realization is what separates the life lived limited and a life full of corrected experiences . Once we get used to putting our life's puzzle together we see that recovery must be a centerpiece. Understanding that our core memories may need work, our actions yield great results and we can tangibly measure success, that is what recovery looks like!

And these are my personal "go-tos" to refocus my mental health and sobriety.

1. Journal: No topic, just write for 5-10 minutes. This promotes a moving mind.

2. Reach out to 3 people randomly. Check on them, encourage engagement.

3. Create something/anything: Could be art, a written letter, a new looking resume or a fun social post.

4. Self-Care: You must be comfortable with yourself enough to take care of #1.

5. Gratitude/Meditation: I use Eddie Pinero and Jason Stephenson (free)

6. Counseling: I still see a counselor weekly. She has my back and also challenges me.

Let us know what makes your list at info@recoveryunbroken.com

ToolKit

Mon, 15 Apr 2024 20:44:28 GMT

how to properly tool your sober toolkit

Adding tools to your toolkit!

In early sobriety, about 15 months ago - with quite a bit of time on my hands - I decided to de-clutter and organize my garage. I became a bit OCD about it, purchasing new storage containers and rack systems for the walls, everything had to have a “home”. I’ve always envied those with tidy garages, like a fire station, everything gets put back in the same place, every time, for good reason. I find comfort knowing my tools are in their right place. I don’t have to think “where is that drill or that utility knife” I know exactly where it is, waiting for me at a time of need.

In our Recovery Unbroken Zoom calls, a “toolkit” is a term that is often used as many of us navigate our lives alcohol free. The toolkit can be an actual comfort item; a non-alcoholic beverage, favorite snack, gum, mints or a mindset “I’m going to employ the Irish exit” (leaving unannounced) if being at a party too long becomes triggering. I’m an NA beer fan. I completely understand that this isn’t for everyone and can be triggering. If I attend a party, I’ll either ensure the host has NA beers or I’ll bring them. After 1 or 2 NA beers, I am not triggered with others drinking alcoholic beverages. It zaps that urge. I usually have gum handy. It gives me something to do and helps me from thinking about drinking and sometimes not overeating too. Other items in my toolkit; podcasts – Recovery Elevator, Smartless for humor and Snap Judgement for thought provoking stories. I also like to paint, something I had not spent a lot of time doing during my drinking phase. A toolkit can evolve over time as well. Here’s a link to a Michael Walsh post about sobriety toolkits: https://michaelwalsh.com/early-sobriety-sober-toolbox

A toolkit is essential in recovery. Going back to the garage example above, create a plan, organize your tools and be open to putting new items in your toolkit over time. They’ll be there waiting for use as you navigate your sobriety journey.

--Chuck W.

What is a "corrective experience"?

Thu, 11 Apr 2024 01:01:08 GMT

what is a "corrective experience"?

Corrective experiences are defined by many mental health professionals as, a way to challenge the way you relate to others, how you view yourself, and how you view past emotional hurts. There are moments in life that shape our opinions, our passions and the path of our existence. What's important to remember is that taking inventory of these moments, and making adjustments, is a healthy practice.

What does this mean? Something that occurred when you were 8 years old doesn't have to shape you today. You can shed the cape of victim, knowing there is no power left in that memory to weigh you down. Doing the work in mental health and recovery has tangible benefits and I promise this is one of them.

What's an example? A few of my favorite things to do is golf, travel and listen to live Country music. In the past when traveling to these activities the experience always involved alcohol. Going to Nashville for a long weekend or a guy's golfing trip doesn't need to be replaced or eliminated, but I want to own the experience again.

Alcohol has taken enough from me through fear, but my future will not be confiscated by drinking. By attending the CMA's last November and embarking on a new sober group golf trip last August I snatched back my memories for me to shape them with a Swayze-like attention to detail.

In order to call the experience "corrected", time must pass. Our patience and balance is tested ( battle tested ). Let your spirituality be your guide and show yourself some grace. This is a hard part of the recovery process. It's not defined as a phrase or level but more so an overt act of mental health intentionality. In part 3 of this blog series I'll talk about healthy ways to judge and gauge our previous selves.

By: Aaron Perry

Are your core memories impaired? Part 1

info@recoveryunbroken.com (Recovery Unbroken) — Mon, 08 Apr 2024 01:26:00 GMT

recover your true core memories

Are your core memories impaired? Part 1...

The term "core memories" was made popular by the 2015 movie, "Inside Out". It highlights and creatively displays the impact that certain experiences have on shaping our personalities and future triggers for emotions ranging from anxiety to euphoria. So what does this mean? And how does it apply to recovery?

Substance use unfortunately for some have started as early as 11 years old. High school brings use temptations, college provides usage opportunity and ages 21-25 are a vital mental transition to the real world and the culmination of the minds development. So many of our core memories are instilled in us during those years. How many of those memories involved substance use? Is the experience remembered accurately or... was trauma planted in an impaired developing brain to only rear it's ruthless head later on in life when stress or trauma is prevalent again.

Recovery offers the freedom for us to unveil the true us again. We have to want that more than we want to escape. Life has to become about engagement of the mind in order to protect our soul. Addiction is a disease of the mind and it's time that in the "10X" era, the investment we need to value is in ourselves.

Personally I'll share a core memory that I'm working to replace and correct. My guess is that many still reading this have also experienced it. I struggled mightily medically as I tried to get sober. From the time I wanted to stop until my last medical detox I estimate I had relapsed roughly 37 times and I had medically detoxed 18 times. Going through withdrawls was very hard on my stomach and I could never count the amount of times I'd splash cold water on my face, begging for God to make it stop, and I'd look up at myself in the mirror. I never recognized myself but I looked like hell and disdain. I'm not there yet but I will achieve replacing that core memory with a moment where I see myself, smile, and probably wink:)

Have a great week! Check back here for part 2 in this blog series.

Aaron Perry

Battle Tested

Tue, 02 Apr 2024 03:53:13 GMT

RU Battle tested

Recovery Unbroken

Battle Tested!

They don't describe those who ran and hid from the enemy as "battle tested". The very definition is "having experienced and been toughened by battle". In addiction we deal with battles in our jobs, families, socially, and physically but so does everyone. What is specific to those who struggle with drugs or alcohol is the battle is waged by another area of our own brain. Is there a more formidable opponent than the devil's advocate on your shoulder doing pushups and reading the "how to" guide on relapse? Saying no to that is battle tested.

This lays out just why each sober day matters. Because each day you said no, you won that day. A battle occured and addiction lost. So if you're triggered right now, and fighting through this 60 minute craving, just know that when you bend down and pick up the pieces of this day, it all fits together when you don't drink. Don't run, don't hide, use your tools and don't let fear guide you. Fear is afraid for the day you stop running and turn around to confront it. What's chasing you is not the great experiences you had when you were younger. It's your pain, trauma and regret, lonely and wanting your attention. It's a wolf in sheep's clothing.

Community in recovery is so important because it validates our experiences, we are heard about scars and we're open to healing together. I'm inspired each day to simply have the opportunity to share what I've been through and much of my peace and acceptance of it has come as a result of others in Recovery Unbroken and the safe stigma-free space we have to be authentic.

7 things to remember when going home

Thu, 28 Mar 2024 16:05:41 GMT

You’re going to feel some anxiety. Many of us return to the scene of the crime so to speak and don’t really prepare ourselves. It’s important to make feeling uncomfortable easier through practice. What does this look like? Mentally, take yourself to that place in your mind. Picture you’re surroundings, the smell, maybe you’re favorite baked good in the kitchen and a hug to your family. Even doing that for the 5 minutes prior to arrival can have an amazing calming effect. But doing it several times and farther in advance will make you a pro handling new surroundings.

Sleep could be rough. It’s not a great idea to arrive to a family gathering tired right? Then you’re one late meal away from having half of H.A.L.T. hit you with 2 of the 4. HALT stands for: Hungry Angry Lonely Tired. All things that will help bring on a craving. So planning on proper sleep and routine are especially important as you plan that trip home.

Old habits tend to die hard. Don’t fall into the same drinking ways. That moment when you walk out to the deck or patio and someone offers you a beer or glass of wine. Know exactly what you’re going to say. Because if you freeze, and no one knows yet, addiction is going to answer for you and you won’t like the answer. When you’re all standing around the kitchen island with wine and cheese and everyone’s voice is 8 levels louder than needed, and it’s easy to just try a few swigs to block out the noise, IF you don’t know exactly what you’re next move is...addiction is likely to decide for you.

Make sure someone knows. This is huge. If you’re avoiding telling even one person, you likely should not be where you’re going. Not when it comes to family who can be especially triggering, emotional and brings up the past. If you’re going to a place where not one person has your back, why are you even there? The incentive here is that you tell all those you’re comfortable with, but it’s gotta be somebody. You cannot rely on addiction or early days of sobriety to babysit you’re well-being while traveling.

Plan on not doing anything too dramatic. Heading back home to see family and friends should be fun and rewarding. Early on in sobriety we want anyone and everyone to hear how different we are and we aren’t the person they previously dealt with. Have patience with people. Just as we had to get sober on our timetable, they will forgive us when the time is right and if we ask for it. Typically an Easter or Christmas is not the best time to bring up drama. In my experience, the random laid back Sunday afternoon get togethers will provide plenty of opportunity to have a real and calm discussion about our progress. So that our family truly understands us better and not just a blind repentance to move on with life.

Make a list. On your trip home, stay focused. Know what you want to do, who you want to see and just as important...what are your boundaries? Where will you not go? Who must you avoid? And what goes in your toolbox? Sticking to your list is going to result in a safe and sober trip home.

What does a successful trip look like to you? If you define it, you can achieve it. Sometimes its simply to not drink. Other times it could be a person or specific conversation, but either way make sure to practice it. Say it outloud to yourself so you know how it sounds. Being accurate in our communication style goes a long way to making the family member we’re speaking with to feel comfortable. By leading the way of comfort in that situation you’ll show respect, competence and maturity that maybe our impaired behavior did not fit with.

At the end of the day, show yourself some grace. You’re doing it! You’ve taken control of your life and the way back can be tough to manage. Recovery Unbroken is here, and we’re in your corner.

4 Hard Truths About Sobriety

Thu, 28 Mar 2024 16:04:02 GMT

You will lose people. Friends, family, death, blackballed. But you also get to choose who stays in your life. It comes at a difficult time because we are often down on ourselves as we recover. That's why seeing ourselves accurately, and in an image of our future growth is very important. I've had individuals cut ties with me stating "I'm not worth the risk". I informed them, where I'm going, I can't risk surrounding myself with disloyal people like them.

Your other preferences may change. Taste, smell, peace, excitement. Dopamine hits hit differently. Hormones take time to heal and often time need temporary medication to stabilize. It's called recovery for a reason, our recovered selves get to emerge which is the authentic us. So don't be alarmed if what you want has changed, it supposed to do that.

You're going to cringe at the past. This is true though in recovery or not. But when we layer in the lens of shame that only we see, it can be hard. Our mind sees the old us. I remember looking at old pictures of myself and just weeping. I was impaired in so many photos, videos, speeches, and televised interviews that haunted me. I'd see the broken Aaron every time I'd blink and when I'd lay my head at night. To no longer cringe at the past, I had to be present for the now to begin building up my future. I'm now proud of the photos I take. I want to make sure my smile is big enough to portray the love that returned my heart to me.

You're going to be called to service at some point. You're going to have to help someone else build their boat when it rains. Once you're breathing ok, you need to help a stranger. Whatever the platitude, if you're waiting for some sort of sign...consider this it. Recovery needs YOU! Reach out to someone in the name of service. Check on someone you never have before. Go into someone's social media and blow it up with love. We all have strengths, passion and this super power called sobriety. Let's use it.

If you're still reading, thank you. Please don't give up. I believe with everything in me that we're doing something very special and we are going to save lives, improve lives and empower recovery. I'm honored to get to share words and thoughts with you. I encourage questions, sharing and interaction.

recovery-unbroken

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Recovery Capital: You're the CEO!

Modern day recovery

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Save Me

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Finding your Tribe

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Where's the party?

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Taking Stock

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I'm sorry Kevin Bacon

I really need to apologize to Kevin Bacon.

My Law

"viewing alcohol as the poison that it legitimately is, allows me to stick to my “law” without romanticizing drinking."

A Passport of Acceptance

"it involves letting go of the struggle against reality and finding peace within it"

Joys of Recovery

"With a clear mind, individuals can think more rationally, make better decisions, and plan for the future."

The Joy of Alcohol Recovery: Embracing a New Beginning

Rediscovering Physical Health

Reconnecting with Emotions

Building Stronger Relationships

Discovering New Passions

Achieving Personal Goals

Mental Clarity and Peace

Spiritual Growth

Giving Back

In the end

5 Must See Recovery Movies

"we own and are known for our moments"

Do you smell smoke?

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Life's Puzzle

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ToolKit

how to properly tool your sober toolkit

What is a "corrective experience"?

what is a "corrective experience"?

Are your core memories impaired? Part 1

recover your true core memories

Battle Tested

RU Battle tested ﻿

7 things to remember when going home

4 Hard Truths About Sobriety

"Vacations don’t need alcohol to be fulfilling. I lived that lie for too long"

RU Battle tested